Introduction
Moments after 5 am on June 2, 2018, I headed into the darkness
on the Provo River trail. Headlamps illuminating the path, 250 runners whooped
and hollered as we took off on an adventure of 50 miles. I surged ahead, full
of nervous energy, to be a part of the lead pack of my second running of this
race. The first two miles were exciting and fast. The last year of training,
preparation, blood, sweat, and tears (totally cliché but also totally true) had
led me to this point. I had felt so pumped and motivated, exhausted and burnt
out, hopeful of winning, afraid of losing, confident in my fitness and ability,
doubtful of my fitness and ability, lots of highs and many lows.
Last year’s race was wild! I had just started to get back
into running as I trained with Jon and got ready to pace him as he ran it My
wife, at the time, had just left me weeks before and I was feeling very
impulsive. Hence, why I thought signing up the night before was a good idea. I
stuck it out and, even though I felt completely trashed afterwards, lived to
tell the tale. It was an incredible experience and lit a fire within me to
start preparing to do it again.
I wasn’t consistent in running until around mid-December.
That is when I threw myself into running. In my last post I talked about some
of the reasons why I run. These were my motivations, both positive and
negative. I enjoyed being outside and crushing goals. I also used it to escape
and seek validation. Which motivation was my driving force varied at any
particular time, but I feel that, as I reflected, I was mindful and aware of
it.
Salt Lake City
Marathon
I had some big weeks and was making awesome progress. I was getting really strong and felt great. I
was having fun and exploring so many new trails. As I looked ahead to the Squaw
Peak 50 in June, it felt so far away. I hadn’t signed up for any other races,
so I decided to look some up that would be good for training and help me in my
preparation. I found a 50k in Susanville the week of BJ’s birthday. Talking to
BJ about it we both strongly felt like it was a meant to be and I had to do it.
That was 3 weeks before the SP 50 and would be a great test of my fitness and a
superb long run. I was stoked. I didn’t stop there and found another race that
was 4 weeks before the 50k, the Salt Lake City Marathon. It would be my first
official marathon. I was apprehensive and wasn’t sure if I was ready for it.
The nervousness came from pressure I was putting on myself to preform well. I
could do the distance but that wasn’t good enough for me. If I wasn’t going to
do it, I wanted to win or at least be very competitive. This seems silly since
I wasn’t preparing for that specific race and was just going to use it as a
training run, but it really stressed me out.
I finally decided to pull the trigger on it the week before.
I had started to mix in some speed work in my training and it was surprisingly
difficult. I eased up the week of the marathon (minus a hike up to Horsetail
Falls (1500’ vert) the Thursday before) and gave it a go. I felt great in the
first part of the race and tried to hold back on the fast downhill start. The
hills in the later part of the race kicked my butt. I hung on and passed some
people towards the end. I finished the last few miles alone. I was clocked in
at 2:54 which earned me 14th place overall, 2nd in my age
group. I was very tired but pleased with my effort. It was much more difficult
than I thought it would be. The first person I saw that I knew was Jon at the
finish line. It was such a special moment recognizing him in the crowd of
hundreds of people and just going over to him and giving him a hug. I was
exhausted and it felt so comforting to have him there. DeLacy was cheering me
on as well and recorded the moment. It is one of my favorite videos. Shannon
and the girls were also at the finish line and had cute signs. One of the read
“My daddy is faster than yours!” It was so fun to see them than hug the girls. I
didn’t tell a lot of people that I was going to do it because I was so nervous
and felt like it would be extra pressure to have them there or expect a certain
result out of me.
Paiute Meadows 50k
I took a week off from running to recover and then got back
to the trails and vert. I noticed my legs felt heavy and didn’t quite have the
same spring to them. I tried to mix in some recovery days but was worried about
losing fitness and not hitting my weekly mileage and climbing goals. I eased up
the week of the race and got ready for go time. I had invited Jon and Kirsti to
roadtrip with me but they were busy and couldn’t get the time off to do it so I
set off alone. After the first hour and a half, I was bored of driving. I
resorted to listening to AM radio and making ridiculous music videos to keep
myself entertained.
As I drove up the hill past Dayton, I could see mountains in
the distance. I wasn’t sure but thought I could see Trifecta (Job’s Peak, Job’s
Sister, and Freel Peak). Turns out I know my mountains, it was them! I started
to get excited that I had arrived and was in familiar territory. Made it to
Levi’s house and went for a walk alongside the river in Genoa with him and
Moriah and Dylan Russell and his daughter. It has been years since I’ve seen him,
and it was neat to see him as a father. You could tell how much he loved her by
how attentive he was to where she was walking and always being on the lookout
to ensure she wouldn’t encounter a snake or get hurt. Levi, Moriah, and I went
out for Pizza at Wild Horse Diner and I was looking forward to paying for it to
thank them for letting me stay with them. They had other plans and insisted on taking
the bill. That was very sweet.
In the morning, I went over to the high school to run on the
track. I got lucky and it was open. I cruised around and soaked in the memories-
track practices, school records, Eagle project. Lots of good times. 3 laps
around and I peeled off my jacket and let it rip the final lap. Felt like I was
flying. My legs felt springy and powerful. I cut through the headwind and then
opened up on the home stretch, lunging for the finish line. Ahh. So good.
Checked the record wall and smiled as I saw my name still up there. “Come on
guys, it’s been a decade. Someone needs to take that down. As Bobby, the
previous record holder reminded me, ‘records are meant to be broken’”.
I went into the school and thought I was too late to see
Coach Frey. With a lucky break, Sister Ovard came around the corner and after
chatting with her for a while, she escorted me to his leadership class where I
got to say hi! It was so much fun getting to see them and catch up for a bit.
Such special people in my life.
I felt I couldn’t be so close without seeing Tahoe, so I
made a quick stop at Levi’s work to see him and the horses he takes care of and
then went up Kingsbury. I drove around the Lake to the north and stopped right
before Incline Village to walk down and stick my feet in. It was great and so
beautiful!
Made the final stretch of the trip and arrived at BJ’s new
office in Susanville 2.5 hours later. It was awesome to see him, and I was
really impressed with his new job as an assistant at a law firm as he was working
on a law degree. I think he will do great and be able to do very well to
provide for his family.
BJ and I sat down evening and went over our game plan for
the race. We talked about different parts of the race he could meet me,
exchange water bottles and gels, and cheer me on. It was exciting, and I was pumped
to have him be a part of the race and do it together. I set out my kit and took
a picture of the flat runner. Woke up early on race day and BJ and I drove into
town to the start. In my pre-race nerves, I had done a lot of research on the
course and the competition. I wanted to do well but didn’t feel as much
pressure because it was a smaller race and I was there to have fun. I was
surprised that the course record holder and winner of the 2 previous years,
Paul Smith, wasn’t signed up for the race. I was even more surprised when the
race director introduced him minutes before the race started.
And we were off! Paul, Matt and I went to the front and
stayed there for the entire race. We had a swift but comfortable pace. It was a
lot of fun just chatting away and just cruising. The views were beautiful. The
cruising and chit chat went on for about 10 miles. Then, we hit the major
climbing section of the course and the grind began and the talking stopped. BJ
and I had planned for 4 spots on the course to meet and it was awesome to see
him at each one. He would holler, and cheer and I would drop my bottle and he’d
hand me a new one. It was a great system we had going and it was wonderful emotional
boost every time I saw him. Matt was the first to drop. He had surged ahead
with each descent and then Paul and I would reel him in. This went on until
mile 23 or so when he started to cramp up and fall off the pace. Paul dropped
on the second to last climb and I found myself alone and in the lead. I used
the downhill that followed the mountain bike trail to put some distance between
me and Paul. There were big jumps and mountain bike features. If I had been out
exploring and out for a fun run I would have totally hit them. Today was not that
day. I was racing, and I was hurting. I went to the side and continued to bomb
the descent. There was one last climb left and it kicked my butt! My left quad
started to twitch, and I was afraid it was going to cramp up. It kept pushing
on even though I had to walk the last part of the climb. Finally, I was able to
look down into the valley and see Susanville, the finish. Though it was visible
it looked so far away. It was relieving and daunting all at the same time. 3
miles to go and it was downhill. I pushed though it hurt. My inner thighs were
twitching too and my lungs hurt. I weezed and kept fighting. There were lots of
switchbacks which were annoying and broke up my rhythm and flow. I looked back
multiple times but couldn’t see Paul. I looked at my watch and estimated when I
would cross the finish line. After the last climb and the switchbacks, I saw
the time I estimated keep growing. After being hopeful of an amazing time, I
just wanted to hold on for the win. I thought I had some ways to go and then
all of a sudden, the trail opened up and I was running in the meadow. I was in
the homestretch. I kicked with everything I had left in the tank. I smiled as I
ran across the finish line and let out a yell of exhilaration as I realized what
I had just accomplished. I had won! I had also crushed the course record. I
looked for the Hubbards and saw Becky in the parking lot. I waved and waited
for them to park and come over. People at the finish line were so nice. They
helped me get some food and sit down. My fellow runners complimented me for the
performance and I thanked them. Turns out BJ took a wrong trail and had gotten
lost on his way back to his house. He was really bummed he missed the finish. I
was glad when he showed up! The rest of the day we just hung out, had burgers,
and picked up his 4-wheeler he had to abandon at a friend’s house. I had been
thinking a lot about the race leading up to the gun going off and it stressed
me out. It felt so good to be done. Not only was it a huge weight off my
shoulders but it was a big confidence boost. I headed back to Utah with an
achievement I was crazy happy with and having had a wonderful weekend with
family and friends old and new.
Three weeks until the Squaw Peak 50, I took a week off to
recover, had a medium week with 48 miles and 6k vert and then an easy week. I had
a few runs that didn’t feel good and overall, I felt fatigued and my legs felt
flat. I tried to rest and give my body extra recovery. I was taking my resting
heart rate in the mornings and was excited by how low it had become. I started
to get higher measurements and didn’t save them. Talking with Tom at work I
realized this could be a sign of overtraining. It made sense with how I was
feeling and what was going on, not only physically but mentally as well. I was
struggling feeling motivated to get out and train.
Squaw Peak 50
I looked down at my watch and my
heartrate wasn’t higher than I wanted it to be. We were cruising but it felt great.
I was running next to Nick Sourlos and we introduced ourselves to each other. I
had been following him on Strava since he was last year’s winner and it was fun
to put a face to the name. We left the Provo River trail and headed up the BST.
The pace remained pushed and my heart rate kept rising. I tried to relax while
remaining contact with the leaders but wasn’t successful in getting my
heartrate under control. Another runner caught up to me and we chatted for a
bit. He said his name was Kyle and I asked “Barrett?” I had followed him for a
while too and complimented him on his success in other races. He had done
really well, and it was fun to put a face to his name as well. Nick, Kyle and I
ran together through the first aid station and then Nick and Kyle pulled away. Nick
wasn’t feeling well and kept making stops to answer nature’s urgent call, so I
would catch up to him and we would run together for a while and then he’d drop
me again.
We made it to aid station 4 and I
looked around for my drop bag. I didn’t see any and asked the people at the aid
station where they were. They replied that they hadn’t showed up yet. “Wow!” I
thought. I was disappointed because my game plan was thrown off but as the same
time impressed I had outran the drop bag delivery truck. I felt like Jim Walmsley
flying in and surprising the aid stations at the WS100. Starting down the
descent I tried to open up and fly myself. It felt good and I was making great
time. I had the tall Joseph Taylor in my sights but couldn’t close the gap. He
was doing awesome! I did catch up to Pablo and we played leap frog a couple of
times. I paid attention for the turn I missed last year which cuts off a little
distance from the road. I thought I had missed it again but then saw and took
it. It felt really good to be on course and was a nice motivational boost. I came
up on an early starter and let her know I was behind her and wanted to pass. We
said hi to each other as I went ahead but then she fumbled her footing as she looked
over at me and went down. I stopped to try and help but she said she was fine
and I could keep going. I felt bad but was glad she was ok. It looked awkward
and she went down hard.
Coming into AS 5, I was really
looking forward to seeing Kirsti. When I showed up, I didn’t see her and realized
the aid station wasn’t where I had thought it was. It was further up the dirt road
and not at the intersection. Turns out I had given super vague directions and
sent her on a wild goose chase to find the aid stations 5 and 6. I felt bummed she had gone through all that
effort for nothing. Nonetheless, I was very grateful. That was very sweet of
her for trying.
I made the decision to ditch my
second handheld bottle and continue with just one. I didn’t like the feeling of
the two. I would keep my nice, insulated bottle and just refill it with the mixed
bottles in my drop bags. I grabbed my snickers and took off. I had held a solid
pace on the descent but once I hit the road I started to feel drained. I struggled
a lot on this section and for a good portion I was all alone. I was also
surprised how far it felt to get to AS6. I kept thinking it would be around the
next turn and turn after turn I was disappointed. I was still running and focusing
on keeping my heartrate from getting too high.
As I am writing this it just dawned
on me that duh, of course my legs felt wrecked. I had just run 26 miles. That
is a marathon. How did I feel after I ran the Salt Lake marathon? That is a
long way to run and exert myself as much as I had so far. During the race, I
had only seen it in terms of 50 miles and only being halfway, but 26 miles is
quite significant in and of itself. Putting it in that context, helps give me perspective
of how to better pace myself for future races and respect the distance.
I forced myself to eat a meal bar
and picked up my Mighty music player from my drop bag. I struggled maintaining
a run and resorted to walking a lot. This is where I started getting caught by
new people. They looked so strong and fresh. I felt awful. I focused on making
it to the next aid station. I tried to remain in contact with people who had
passed me but that proved to be futile. I made it to AS7 and laughed thinking
back to last year when I sat with my feet in the creek. This year was a night
and day difference in regard to time spent at aid stations. This was one part
of my game plan I wanted to improve upon. Another was keeping my shoes on and
so far, things were good. I still hadn’t changed socks or even had the need to re-tie
my shoes.
I pushed on and again spend a lot
of time alone. I started getting tired of sugar foods but tried to force myself
to keep eating. I walked the climbs and
alternated between slow running and walking on the flats. It made me really
happy to see AS 8. It felt like my pace was crawling, but the aid station appeared
much sooner than the previous year. I
was grateful for that.
Pablo, an early starter and I left
at the same time and headed out on the longest, most difficult section of the
course. I missed a turn and the early start guy called out. Glad I had only
made it a few hundred feet! Pablo and I leap frogged some more but then I was
alone, just me and the mountain. I made my way up and though I was slowed to
mostly walking I felt in the zone and focused on making consistent progress. I
was energized by the thought of a rematch on Bozung Hill. Last year, it was
where Jon dropped me, and I figuratively crashed and burned. It was where I hit
the wall and I wanted a rematch.
It was slow, but I made my way up
the final climb steadily. Ian Farris, paced by Brandon Dase, made some ground
on me but I made it my goal to not get passed by them on the climb. I pushed on
and actually caught another early starter. I was really struggling with a side
stitch that made descending very difficult. I hoped the long climb would help
with it relaxing and going away. It did go away while I was climbing but as
soon as I started descending it came back. I focused on my breathing, I tried
stretching my side. It wasn’t that effective but after making it to AS9 and getting
more water in me it started to feel better.
The huge surge I had last year on this descent was nowhere
to be found this time. My legs were toast and it was a grind. It was so nice
that there was no snow or mud on the course which made it fast if your legs
allowed. Mine did not. Still, the better conditions helped me as well and I continued
down the trail. On the rut and sunflower section right before Big Springs I suddenly
caught up to Pablo, Ian, and Brandon. They got stuck behind 3 people of horses
on the single-track trail with tall, thick bushes walling in the trail. There
was nowhere to go to get around them, so they just had to fall in line and
wait. I got to catch my breath and be right there with the other guys in the
race again which was nice. After a few minutes of following the horses, the
trail opened up, they stepped aside, and we were able to pass. Any hopes of this situation working to my advantage
and moving up in position were distinguished by my dead legs. They didn’t have
any extra gears in them and we help our positions we had been in before.
I descended into the final aid station and could taste the
finish. It was so close. I had some more water, skipped my drop bag, swigged
some Redbull and took off. Going through the park I suddenly felt nauseous and
though I was going to puke. I stopped and tried to hide behind a tree so the
families at the park couldn’t see me. False alarm but I still didn’t feel that
great. I carried on and ran the last section on the road. I could see Ian and
Brandon up ahead and tried to close on them, but they instead gained more distance
on me. I tried to kick but my legs didn’t respond. I felt my cardio could go
harder but legs couldn’t match. It felt slow but was progress. Though I felt
drained, I looked ahead to the finish line with excitement.
For months, I had trained. I had logged hundred of miles and
thousands of feet of climbing. All my worries and concerns going in to this
race no longer mattered. I had gone out fast and blown up. The first 2 miles were
fast, and I was flying. The next 48 were miserable and I suffered through them.
I was seeded #1 coming into the race with a projected time of 8:08. Based on
this prediction, I had failed catastrophically. The coolest thing happened though.
I looked up and could see the houses of Vivian Park. Cars were lining the
street and I recognized Kirsti’s. I was going to finish! I didn’t give up even when
things got difficult and hurt like crazy. I turned the corner into the park and
smiled. I saw Kirsti cheering for me and my smile grew even bigger. I ran all
the way through the finish line and then touched the ground, my chest, kissed
my finger and pointed to sky. I was so relieved to have completed this journey.
I was not just tired from the race but exhausted physically and mentally from
the training and everything that led up to this day. That accomplishment of
finishing meant more to me than the place or the time. I ended up finishing in
9:28 and in 14th place. Last year, I finished in 14:22 and 141st
place! Crazy! What an amazing learning experience and I am grateful for the
good and the bad, the ups and the downs, the triumphs and the trials. My
parents were there too, and I gave them a big hug. It was so nice to have their
support.
I am grateful for the support of my family and friends, the blessing
of having a body and the ability to run, the beautiful trails and views. In the
end, that is what matters. That we be grateful for what we’ve been blessed with
and work together in pursuit of our goal to achieve eternal life. That is the
journey we are on. We will have ups and downs, make wrong turns, and get ahead
of ourselves and our abilities. It is important to remember to be present and
appreciate how much more good there is than bad at any given moment. That feeling
of accomplishment is going to be so much greater when we reach the finish line
of life and are reunited with family and friends. Our finishing time or place
won’t matter as long as we keep pushing and finish.
“Let us run with
patience the race that is set before us,
Looking unto Jesus
the author and finisher of our faith;”
Hebrews 12:1-2
Start- 5:00 AM
Hope Campground (5.58 mi)- 5:53 AM
Rock Canyon (10.85 mi)- 6:48 AM
Horse Mountain (14.62 mi)- 7:29 AM
5 Pole Heaven (20.4 mi)- 8:17 AM
6 Left Fork (26.05 mi)- 9:06 AM
7 Sheep Canyon (29.98 mi)- 9:57 PM
8 Little Valley (33.52 mi)- 10:45 PM
9 Windy Pass (41.49 mi)- 12:52 PM
10 Big Springs (46.5 mi)- 1:58 PM
Finish (50 mi)- 2:28:40 PM
Start
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
Finish
|
|
2017
|
5:00:00
|
6:18
|
7:36
|
8:52
|
10:18
|
11:37
|
13:04
|
14:10
|
17:10
|
18:48
|
19:22:55
|
2018
|
5:00:00
|
5:53
|
6:48
|
7:29
|
8:17
|
9:06
|
9:57
|
10:45
|
12:52
|
13:58
|
14:28:40
|
