Monday, July 31, 2017

Lone Peak- Pleasure and Pain

June 10, 2017

One week after running the Squaw Peak 50, Jon invited me to hike Lone Peak with him and 2 other wranglers. I was feeling better i.e. the uncontrollable shaking when I stood up had stopped and hadn’t come back the rest of the week. I tried to go for an easy run on Wednesday and it was rough. I think it was a combination of still being wrecked as well as allergies that caused my knee hurt a little bit and my breathing to be super labored even though I was just trotting along. So, when I got invited I was hesitant but didn’t want to miss out on the opportunity so I said yes.

The trail was beautiful and very fun. On the way up, I could feel some tightness in my knee but it wasn’t hurting. It made me nervous but I kept at it and enjoyed the scenery. When we got to the snow someone mentioned glissading on the way down. I looked up and thought they were joking. There was no way we were going to glissade down it. It was crazy steep! I dismissed it and, kicking out steps, charged up.

When Jon and I finally made it to the top we were stoked, giddy with adventurous adrenaline. It had been a steep hike but the last stretch required some sketchy scrambling. It was very exposed and I loved it. It looked awesome and felt awesome! We went up in our trail running get up and met a group of people in full on mountaineering gear. We effortlessly leaped around the rocks. This also was in stark contrast to the group we had joined on the summit. One of them was sprawled out and only moved around by crawling on all fours. He looked petrified by fear. It made me reflect on how people react to different situations. I have always been prone to being willing to throw caution to the wind and take more risks outdoors. I have been known to be referred to as an “adrenaline junkie”. I don’t know what factors may have contributed to that but it seems like it is a part of my personality. I do recognize that experience has helped give me confidence to be riskier. I remain respectful but the more familiar I am with a situation, the more comfortable I am and act more freely as a result.  At first, I chuckled to myself at the group of adventurers that we joined on top of Lone Peak, but then I realized that even though they were so nervous up there, they had reached the summit. They were really no different than me at all. They were seeking adventure and wanted to get outside their comfort zone and push their limits. Everyone is unique and has their own limits. Who am I to compare myself to others and diminish their accomplishments even if just in my mind? After recognizing that, I felt very proud of them.  


As soon as we began our descent, the pain flared up. Ibuprofen helped for a while but the final mile was awful. Every step sent sharp pain to my knee. I resorted to walking sideways or even backwards to make it down. Aaron, and Logan had long dropped me and eventually Jon did as well so I finished the trek alone. I was very grateful to be done. Doing Lone Peak so soon after the Squaw Peak 50 was a stupid decision. My body did not like it. It was awesome though…

Thanks Aaron Williams for putting together such a cool video of our adventure!







Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Is That Even Safe?

Squaw Peak 50




June 2, 2017

Met up with Jon at the pre-race event. He was getting his race packet, dinner, and instructions. Sitting in the parking lot and seeing the other runners I was feeling left out. There is always an excitement in the air before a race. Everyone is stoked but nervous and the feeling is contagious.

In the few months leading up to this point, I was training with Jon and was surprised with how I was keeping up and performing. I hadn’t been running that consistently but had been off and on with guys at work. The first time I went out with them after not running for months we hammered out an 8 miler with some longs stretches in the snow. I had some foot pain that bothered me but besides that I felt good. I was really happy to have been able to just go out and get that done. The foot pain bugged me and I tried to take it easy after that and only ran once or twice a week with them. We did some speed work and it had me sucking wind but I was improving week to week. I wasn’t able to keep up with the guys, that were months into their marathon training schedule, but I hung with them as long as I could and stayed close. I took care of some plantar warts on my feet and that magically fixed my foot pain.
Jon and I did an 11 miler out to Bridal Veil Falls and back. We talked about the Squaw Peak 50 and how I would help pace him. I had a crazy thought. He has been training a lot more than me but I am hanging with him now. I heard about the SP50 a few years back and thought it sounded like such a gnarly race that someday would be so cool to do. As we ran and I thought about it, I thought if Jon was ready I might be able to do it too.  I mentioned this to him and he felt it wouldn’t be the best decision. He said I probably could finish but it would wreck my body. I decided he was right and that it was a dumb idea. The run we were on was the farthest I had gone in years. 14 miles was my longest run ever and that was 5 years ago.

Hanging out with Jon and the other runners the idea came back to me. I asked if it was even possible to enter and they said I could. I told Jon and he laughed and I don’t think he thought I was seriously considering it. He reminded me that it would not be good for my body but I probably could do it. He certainly didn’t talk me out of it. I had my check book in the car and went to go get it. I was in a very impulsive mood and with a giddy smile, wrote a check and said, “Let’s do this!” I was amped up! I got my schwag and race bib which I promptly crumpled up, threw it on the ground, and stomped on it per tradition. Jon and I went to go get our spaghetti dinner and listen to the pre-race instructions. I think I had equal proportions of spaghetti to salad to apple pie with ice cream. As I stood there eating and listening, I started to panic a little bit but bit my lip and tried to put on a tough, I’ve been here before, face. Mentally I was starting to wet myself. What had I signed up for. I was not ready! I tried to calm myself down and think about how I was going to approach it. Jon had a game plan all figured out. He had his pacers lined up and prepped. He had food prepped and drop bags planned out and ready to go. I threw a wrench into his plans because I wasn’t going to be driving up and meeting him halfway. He had to do some scrambling to figure out how to still make his plan work. I felt bad I changed it up on him last minute because the he was nervous and the planning helped him feel dialed in. I also felt bad because he had been preparing so much for this and it was his thing. I didn’t want to steal his thunder or take away from his accomplishment so I tried to keep my participation as much on the D.L. as possible. I asked Jon if he was cool with me doing it and he said he was.  I still wanted to make this about him and not take away from his moment. I was looking forward to him performing to the best of his abilities and proving himself to himself.

I told Shannon what I was going to do and she was really worried. She said, “Is that even safe?” It wasn’t the smartest choice but I would do my best. She was cute and reminded me to wear sunscreen, drink lots of water and remember to breathe. I was grateful for her encouragement.

We headed home and I had to scramble to get things ready. I had brought extra food and gear so I would be more than prepared for my leg. I went to Runner’s Corner and searched desperately for a running top and a hat. I couldn’t find a hat but was able to get a white tank and some electrolyte tablets. When I got back to base (Will’s house) we worked on drop bags. This is something I hadn’t even thought about but Jon helped me out. We got them ready and then went to bed around 9:30. I had a hard time falling asleep because my mind was running wild with excitement and anxiety. The next day I would be putting my body and mind through probably the most demanding thing I had ever done before. I wasn’t ready but I was going to give my best effort at it and see how things turned out. I wanted to crush it.

June 3, 2017

Jon and I woke up at about 3:45 AM and got ready. I didn’t have much to eat for breakfast. I think I had a banana and some of Jon’s burnt oatmeal. We drove up the canyon and found the parking lot with all of the other runners. What a bunch of crazy people! It was still dark out. Felt like the middle of the night and we were all getting ready to go running. It was so cool to see everyone thought. I was filled with excitement because I had always wanted to experience this and be a part of it. Now here I was. Everyone else looked like they were seasoned pros that knew exactly what they were doing and how to do it. I was scatter-brained and trippin’ out. We had to walk ¾ miles along the river to Vivian park to the start. Jon and I kept our sweats on for as long as we cool and both felt we should ditch them instead of running with them for the first part of a race. We stashed them behind a tree and hurried to the starting line. There we were. Two newbies amongst a group of hard core ultra-runners. With headlamps on and a last-minute set of instructions and inspiration we were sent off. Go time!




Start- 5:00 AM

I was still in amazement and shock that we were actually doing this. We were a part of an ultra race! I turned my Garmin to display pace and kept an eye on how we were doing. Pace was going to be really important because it was such a long race and I didn’t want to get burned out early. I wanted to hold back and try and preserve myself for as long as I could. Jon and I were both really surprised by how fast everyone was going out. I kept looking at my watch and telling Jon we needed to slow down. We kept speeding up with everyone and hovered around 8-9 min/mile pace. That was way too fast! Our goal was 13-15 min/mile pace. We let a lot of people pass us and kept holding ourselves back. I felt good but knew I shouldn’t be running so fast right now. It made a bit more sense why people were going so fast once we left the river trail and turned up the Bonneville Shoreline trail with was single track and didn’t have any room for passing. Once we got to there our position was pretty much locked in for the next few miles. The sun started to rise and it lightened up. As soon as we turned onto the trail the climbing began. There was a lot of climbing in store for us today.

Hope Campground (5.58 mi)- 6:18 AM

We cruised into the first aid station and were met by a people who looked like they had just woken up from camping. Which they had. They had pancakes and sausage cooking and I filled up my water and grabbed some for the road. They had a box for headlamps so we ditched ours there. The trail we were on was very pretty. There were aspens and green vegetation all around and it opened up into lush meadows with wild flowers in parts. We met an older guy from Connecticut who had traveled out here just to do the run. It was fun to talk to him and hear how much he enjoyed being in our backyard. We sure do take it for granted sometimes. There is so much to see and do right here where we are blessed to live.

Rock Canyon (10.85 mi)- 7:36 AM

I was wearing a new pair of compression socks I bought from Walmart and hadn’t tried running in yet. The bottom of my left foot was tight and started to bother me. I was hoping it was just from the socks and the tension they were putting on my feet. This is the first time up to this point I really thought I might not be able to finish. I didn’t say anything and just kept pressing forward and upward. It wasn’t a horrible pain but it did bother me. I still had a very long way to go.

I had been eating energy gels in between aid stations and had downed about 4 at this point. At aid stations, I went for the chips and got my bottles filled. One with water and the other with Heed. At this aid station, they had a bowl of ibuprofen which I thought was funny. We continued on Squaw Peak road and missed the turn off for the trail. I was surprised by just how easy it was to miss it. I had heard of runners making wrong turns during races and how that was possible. I now realized just how easy it can be to get distracted or zoned out and completely miss a turn off. Luckily the runners behind us shouted out and got our attention. We only missed it by a few hundred yards so it wasn’t too much of a loss. The trail got snowy and muddy. We got back to Squaw Peak road and there was a big section still covered in snow. Only a small path of mud, just wide enough to walk through, was what we passed through it on.

Horse Mountain (14.62 mi)- 8:52 AM

When we got to the aid station, they told us it was aid station #4. They skipped aid station 1. Weird. But hey! We were already at 4 instead of 3. We had a drop bag here so were able to bathe in the sunscreen we packed and I switched my socks. We also got our sunglasses which was a good call putting them in the drop bag instead of packing them from the get go. That was my idea and I was proud of it. I filled my bottles, grabbed some chips and a potato and we were off and away again. My foot did feel better as we started running again and I was super grateful.

The view was gorgeous and we were feeling really good. We were still holding back and had slowed down multiple times to keep our pace from getting too fast. Making our way down the long descent we had stretches where we just walked to keep our pace even. We found out we took another “wrong turn” by staying on the road and missed the trail. It took us to the same place but we added an extra half mile or so by missing that shortcut.
Will and Jess had gone camping the night before to be able to meet up with us as we made our way through that section of the race. It was so fun to see them. Will took his ADHD meds and a red bull that morning and talked our ears off. He was so hyper, talked super fast the entire time he ran with us. His mouth ran probably more than his legs did. It was so much fun to have him running with us and he definitely provided a good moral boost.
I couldn’t believe how much I was peeing! I was peeing about every half hour and I knew this wasn’t a good sign. That is way too often and my water was just going through me. Jon on the other hand hadn’t peed once. We were worried about that too.



5 Pole Heaven (20.4 mi)- 10:18 AM

A lot of runners had passed us and we weren’t sure where we stood in the race. We asked how many had already come through and they told us were about 250 out of 300. We were bringing up the rear! We kept on and made it to road. We passed a porta-potty and I couldn’t pass it up. Felt like a sauna. Not fun but needed, if you know what I mean.

The road was surprisingly tough. It was really hot and I was starting to feel the run taking its toll. Up to this point I had felt pretty dang good. I was running strong and mentally I was in a good place. The road started to suck that out of me. We caught up to Davy Crockett who was doing the 2nd part of his double. He was throwing down M&M’s like candy (oh wait...they are candy) when we got to him. We said hi and told him how awesome we thought he was for being so hard core. Someone asked how he was feeling and his answer was very honest. “I’m feeling pretty crappy.” That sums up running. It is a love-hate relationship. Running provides cool experiences, accomplishment, and there are times when you feel like you are floating or flying. You have to earn all of that and it comes at a price. That price is feeling pretty crappy most of the time.

At one point on the road I could feel my legs start to tense up. They started to feel like I was going to cramp up and so I slowed my pace. Sure enough, I started to feel some cramping in my hip flexors. This got me really worried. I didn’t know if the cramping would go away. If it didn’t, the race would be over for me. I had another gel, more water, an electrolyte tablets. I walked for a bit and thankfully the cramping subsided and I was able to continue.

6 Left Fork (26.05 mi)- 11:37 AM

We finished up the road section and made it to a packed and busy aid station. I took off my shoes and socks and put bare feet in the creek. I also poured a bunch of water on my head. It felt so refreshing and wonderful.

Will decided he was still feeling good and so he kept running with us. We had to cross through a wide creek and I decided I didn’t want to get my shoes wet so I took them off. Everyone else just walked through the water in their shoes. We started to climb again and kept our careful pace. Were it got steeper we walked. Jon was focused more on keeping his heart rate from getting to high and so that helped keep up in a good place without pushing too hard.

7 Sheep Canyon (29.98 mi)- 1:04 PM

We made it to the aid station which had our cooler. This was a nice break. Jess met us up there and so it was Will, Jess, Jon and me hanging out and having a good time. I took advantage of the creek again to kick off my shoes and soak my toes. We had packed pita and hummus and this was our first “meal” of the day. We took some time here to just rest and relax for a while before taking on the back half of the course. I had little idea of what I was in for. I would consider this to be about 1/3 completed effort wise. The next 20 miles would be much different, almost like an entirely different race. Jon and I thanked Will and Jess for helping out and supporting us and then checked out of the aid station and continued onward.

Leaving the aid station, we had to jump from rock to rock up the creek. The race course was up the creek. It was a lot of fun.

Saw a dead moose on the trail.

It was hot out but we kept making progress. I was still drinking one bottle of water and the other bottle of Heed. I was starting to drag and my feet were getting sore. We made it to another climb and there were many people that were either taking breaks on the side of the trail or going very slowly. We were climbing strong and caught a lot of people. Coming down my knee started to bother me a bit and I my legs felt wobbly. I was so grateful when we finally made it to the aid station. I was looking forward to my summer sausage and taking a break.

8 Little Valley (33.52 mi)- 2:10 PM

I got my drop bag and pulled out my summer sausage. It didn’t do so well in the heat either. It was ruined. Threw the whole thing away. That was a blow that wasn’t fun. I did have some other gels and an energy shot. I started to feel a lot better after that and Jon and I went on hunt mode. We started catching more and more runners. It was felt great every time we made another “kill”. We kept climbing and the views were gorgeous. I hadn’t been in this backcountry area before but it was beautiful. Trees, valleys, and mountains as far as my eyes could see. Looking up we saw the top of the climb and kept working on it. When we got to the top it made its way around and we could see way off in the distance, across a valley, the road that Vivian park is on. The finish was still a really, long ways away and were going the wrong way. The trail took us back and away from the finish.

I was trying to pace my water consumption as well but had already gone through almost both of my bottles. I wasn’t exactly sure where the next aid station was going to be but I had a feeling I was going to be in trouble.

We had thought we had already made it to and conquered the infamous Bozung Hill. At least we had hoped we had. We knew looking at what mile we were on that it couldn’t be. My watch died 34 miles in so we were relying on Jon’s now. Around another few turns and some more up and down things finally opened up and we saw it. It was really intimidating looking up and seeing people way high up there. Our climbing had only just begun and it was about to get real.

I was still feeling alright and we kept passing people. About a third of the way of the last huge climb, I hit a wall. Jon was stoked about the climbing and was feeling great. He took off and dropped me. It seemed like he hit the gas and I hit the brakes. I barely made it up to about the halfway point and was really hurting. My legs ached and I felt depleted. I continued on and made it to the snow. I sat down and tried to let my legs rest and recuperate a bit. I was really thirsty and scrapped off the top later of snow, got some snow from deeper down and chomped on that. It felt refreshing and helped but still just wasn’t doing it for me. I tried to keep going up and progress was very slow. I had to keep stopping because I had such little energy and ached so much. People started to pass me and looked like they were climbing with such little effort and enjoying it. Other people looked like they were enjoying it too but they were having lunch on the side of the trail in the shade. I wanted to be the first type of people but the second type was starting to be more and more appealing. How I would have like to just rest, have a nice meal and cool off! Mentally and physically I was really struggling. I finally made it to the top. I was relieved but also worried because as I started to go down my legs, especially my knee, were really hurting. I was afraid of the pounding and making things worse. I usually tear it up going downhill. I felt like I was being torn up. My left knee had a sharp pain on the outside which made every step hurt. I was getting passed on the downhill now too! My stomping grounds.

9 Windy Pass (41.49 mi)- 5:10 PM

Finally made it to the aid station. It wasn’t much but it was an oasis. All the good stuff had already been long gone but there was water. I drank multiple bottles and filled them up for the next stretch. I also took some aspirin for the pain. I think I even got a little bit of a cookie crumble.

It was going to be all downhill from here. One might think that would be easy, amazing and wonderful. If only. The mountain still had a lot of snow on it. They had cut out steps but they had been trampled and melted by the time I got there. Trying to kick steps and walk down proved to be very difficult and more of a waste of time and energy. The best way to make progress was to glissade. Didn’t feel too good in my super short running shorts but it got the job done. The snow went on for a ways and when we got out the next obstacle was mud. The entire trail was muddy. This made things slow and difficult and required the expenditure of more time and energy. Nothing about the descent so far was easy. I was running with some other runners and they commented that the course this year was way harder with all of the snow. The year before, many parts we had covered in the snow they had run on dry ground. One of the people I was with was sort of doing what I had done. He had only run a half marathon and decided to just jump in and run the 50. I was excited for him but also deep down I didn’t want to lose or even finish close together. I wanted to dominate. My body though, wasn’t feeling like dominating.

I kept up with them for a while and then took another energy shot. I tried to time it right so that it would get me to the finish. I took it at about mile 43 or so. I was hanging in there but feeling like I was dragging along. When it kicked in, I felt great and said goodbye to my group and took off. Oh man did I take off. I felt awesome again and started making more “kills”. I passed runner after runner as the trail flattened out and had some rolling hill like features. Making the descent into Big Springs I crushed it. I was flying! I caught a lot more people and kept a brutal pace.

10 Big Springs (46.5 mi)- 6:48 PM

I made it into the aid station and was dialed in and on attack mode. I quickly filled my bottles and washed down some more ibuprofen with a red bull. My first red bull ever by the way. I took off down the road determined to make it to the end. I was starting to feel the pain again and my stomach wasn’t doing so hot. I caught a few more runners but when I passed South Fork park I knew I couldn’t pass up the bathroom. After conducting my business, I was back on the road. My knee really hurt and I would get a sharp pain every couple of steps. I focused on my breathing and staying positive. When I finally saw the houses, I knew I had made it. I was going to finish. This is when it really became real. I sped up even though I was in a lot of pain. I caught a father and son running together right before I turned the corner into the park. Everyone was cheering and there were people everywhere celebrating. I made it through the park and crossed the finish line. I had done it. I was finished.

The back half of the race was very difficult. I had a lot of time to think and ponder. My mind was filled with thoughts of my family. I missed them so much and wanted so badly to see them and hold them in my arms. I kept thinking about Shannon, Shiloh, and Lilly and pictured them at the finish line. In the past, I have always been very independent and wanted to do my own thing. I haven’t cared if my family was there supporting me and even opposed it. I don’t know why but it hasn’t ever really been my thing and I wanted to just do it by myself, not make a big deal out of it, and not waste their time. Maybe that was me being selfish and not wanting to share the experience. As I was making my way down the mountain and towards the finish, all I wanted was to see Shannon and the girls. I wanted to see them at the finish and give them all a great, big hug. I wanted to share the experience and accomplishment with them and just be together. I realized they were the most important things in my life and I wanted to be with them so badly. Thoughts of them pushed me further and kept me going. I was able to do what I did because of them.

Finish (50 mi)- 7:22:55 PM

After I crossed the finish line, I made it to the grass and sat down. I was exhausted but elated. I took my shoes off and texted Shannon. I was filthy dirty but I sent her a picture to prove I was still alive. I didn’t really look or feel like it though. It felt very surreal. I had just finished running 50 miles but it was all just a blur. 14 hours and 22 min of just me and the mountains.



I found Jon and I was so happy for him and his success. From the time he took off, he worked and catching people and did really well. He finished over a half hour before me in 114th place.  I did surprisingly well to and came in 141st place. We drove back to provo and Shannon said she would be down to meet up. I took a much-needed shower and then drove over to see her and the girls. It was so good to see them! It felt amazing to hug and be with them.

I went back to Will’s house and watched a movie with Jon. It felt nice to be able to just lay down and relax. I tried to get up once and immediately felt super nauseous and started to shake. My whole body was trembling and I had to lay back down. I covered back up with a blanket and the shaking went away. That was very weird. It happened another time and I just had to take it really easy.

In the morning, I could barely walk. I felt like such an old man. I went back up to Riverton to go to church and I could barely get around. My legs and feel were wrecked. I only made it for one hour before needing to just go back home to bed.

Monday, I was feeling a bit better and not as sore. Tuesday, almost all of the soreness was gone and I feeling a lot better. I tried to go for a little 2 mile run on Wednesday but that was not so good.  I had a hard time breathing and my lungs really hurt. I think my allergies flared up too which didn’t help. Besides trying to jump into running again too soon, I am absolutely amazed at how incredible our bodies are.  It is so astonishing that our bodies can heal and repair themselves. My body was in shock and I was barely able to walk and three days later was feeling great again and could move around without any problems. Absolutely amazing what the body can do. It is an incredible gift.

I learned a lot from my experience from the Squaw Peak 50 mile race. Deciding to run it was not one of my best ideas but certainly not one of my worst. I look forward to doing more ultras but with a lot more preparation and training. Am I crazy for what I did? Yup.